8 Coping Questions
Most solution-focused coping interventions involve well-targeted statements or coping questions that investigate problems and indicate ways to deal with them (Lipchik, 1988).
Coping questions are insightful and self-explorative. More than responding to the test administrator or therapist, these questions enlighten us and make us aware of how we can use them to reduce stress.
Person-centered therapies are designed to explore and ask questions about coping to help clients discover their potentials and be self-reliant. Coping questions help in shifting one’s perspective and redirecting focus on themselves.
Some common coping questions used in positive interventions are:
- How did you manage to do your tasks through the day and make it to the session?
- How do you keep going when you feel hopeless?
- What holds you back from hurting yourself when you feel sad?
- What keeps you going during unpleasant situations?
- How do you deal with the daily stressors of life?
- What keeps you hopeful when things don’t seem right?
- How have you managed adversities in the past?
- What stopped you from giving up?
3 Coping Exercises and Activities
In our Positive Psychology Toolkit© we have over 400 tools, made for practitioners, teachers and more. Many of these therapy tools can be used to assist clients with coping. We will briefly mention a few here.
1. Acceptance with ice-cubes
Acceptance is an essential positive coping technique. This exercise will allow you to notice your sensations and accept their existence without trying to control or change them. There are four steps in this exercise, and you can learn more about it from the Practicing Acceptance with Ice-cubes exercise in the Toolkit.
Step 1 – Take one or two ice cubes and hold them gently on your palm. Try to keep holding them for the next couple of minutes.
Step 2 – After a few seconds, you will start feeling extreme cold on your skin. At this point, you might have thoughts about letting go of the ice cubes to restore warmth and comfort. Your goal at this stage would be to notice these thoughts without trying to act on them.
Step 3 – The third stage is about tuning into your emotions. You may notice feelings such as fear or discomfort. Try to see how you are feeling and what thoughts are popping into your mind while you continue holding the ice cubes.
Step 4 – The fourth step of this exercise is about offering kindness and gratitude to yourself. While you may continue experiencing extreme sensations, try to comfort and remind yourself that this is not harmful to you.
Step 5 – Finally, release the ice blocks and warm your hands with a dry towel or cloth.
When you feel the cold sensation fading away, try to recall the experience and ask yourself:
- What did I learn from this exercise?
- What thoughts and emotions did I experience while I was holding the ice cubes?
- How did I react to my emotions? Can I use a similar approach to my life problems?
2. Coping with guilt through writing
Writing is one of the most favorite methods of self-expression and emotional catharsis. Pennebaker and Beall (1986) developed expressive writing as a method of adaptive coping. Their findings suggest that if we engage in journaling about the things that we are ashamed of and open up about unpleasant thoughts and actions, we can confront stressors and adapt to them more efficiently.
You can find the complete Dealing With Guilt Through Writing exercise from the Toolkit, and below is a summary of how it looks.
Step 1 – Reflect on your thoughts |
Ask yourself: |
|
What incidents or actions am I ashamed of? |
____ |
How do I feel about them? |
____ |
What emotions and thoughts are associated with these incidents? |
____ |
Step 2 – Restructure your story |
Recall the incidents you noted in step 1 and take a few moments to imagine other possible and more positive ways they could have ended. Consider how you would have advised a friend to deal with the same situation or how you will face similar circumstances in the future. |
____ |
Step 3 – Self-evaluation |
Note down everything that this exercise helped you learn. Summarize your key takeaway points from the activity and jot down how you can use these lessons in your real life. |
____ |
3. 5-4-3-2-1 Grounding exercise for helping kids to cope
Children often have a tough time accepting changes or facing early life stressors. The 5-4-3-2-1 Grounding Technique helps kids utilize their five senses to be aware of what is happening around and inside them, and learning to choose the right way to adapt to change.
The exercise is simple and follows a systematic approach, as shown below:
|
Taste – Finally, try to name one thing that you can taste now. It may be your toothpaste or a flavor you can still feel from lunch. Try to pay close attention and say it aloud. |
Smell – Try to pay attention to your surroundings and name any two things that you smell. You don’t have to judge them as bad or good, try to notice them and say it aloud. |
Listen – Pay attention and try to name any three sounds that you hear at this moment. It can be the clock ticking, or the fan moving, or the birds chirping – call any three such sounds that are grabbing your attention. |
Touch – Listen to your body and try to name any four things that you are feeling right now. It may be your socks, clothes, your hair, or the cold. Try to sense them and speak aloud. |
Vision – Look around and name five things that you can see. Say them out loud as you see them. |
What our readers think
Hi! I am a high school student and we are conducting a research for our final output for the last quarter. May I ask the reference for this statement “The focus-oriented state and trait theories of coping recognize a person’s internal resources and mental capacities for evaluating how well he can adapt to a situation. On the other hand, the approach-oriented micro and macro analytic coping theories revolve around how concrete or abstract the coping mechanisms are (Carver, 1989).” I will deeply appreciate if you could help me on this one, thank you in advance!
Hi Venice,
Our apologies! There were a few references missing from this post’s reference list. The one you’re looking for is as follows:
Carver, C. S., Scheier, M. F., & Weintraub, J. K. (1989). Assessing coping strategies: A theoretically based approach. Journal of Personality and Social Psychology, 56(2), 267-283.
Hope this helps!
– Nicole | Community Manager
Hi Ma’am, this article is very helpful. How can I cite this as one of my references in APA format? Thank you so much
Hi Mary Ann,
You can reference this article in APA 7th as follows: Chowdhury, M. R. (2020). What is coping theory? PositivePsychology.com. Retrieved from https://positivepsychology.com/coping-theory/
Hope this helps!
– Nicole | Community Manager
Thank you very much for the great article.
“Based on these findings, there are three groups or sub-divisions of coping mechanisms:
Physiological coping – including yoga, art, naturopathy, breathing exercises, and muscle relaxation.
Cognitive coping – including mindfulness, thought restructuring, and meditation.
Environmental coping – including nature walks, bonding with pets, etc..”
Is this part referred to a specific reference? If so, I would like to know which one that is.
If the categorization was done by the author, that is fine.
Thank you in advance for your help.
Hi Rachel,
Glad you found value in this article! I believe these categorizations were made by the author. But for a categorization scheme based on research findings, definitely take a look at the Coping Wheel in this article, as well as the original Skinner and Zimmer-Gembeck (2007) reference for a review on different coping mechanisms.
Hope this helps!
– Nicole | Community Manager
Hello, I am a psychology student, and as a discipline’s final work i asked to carry out a research work and subsequently carry out a scientific article. I am from Portugal, and at the moment we are in the second confinement phase because of Covid-19 and for the theme of work Was thinking to choose coping strategies in the first and second wave of confinement and gender differences, what do you think of the theme?di
Hi Anna,
Sounds like an interesting topic! Yes, the topic of coping as it relates to COVID appears to be garnering interest. I’d do a search for papers in Google Scholar using the keywords “coping” and “COVID” to see what comes up and review the existing research in this space. That way, you can ensure your research offers something unique or complemtnary to that which is already published (e.g., see this paper by Fullana et al. 2020).
Hope this helps!
– Nicole | Community Manager
I’m Faiza, Bachelor nursing science student form Open University Malaysia(OUM).
Im doing my research project regarding coping mechanism among undergraduate student at OUM but i still done have the example of questions that can i used to adopted for my research instruments.
Kindly to give or share questions for me.
Tq so much.
Hi Faiza,
I’d check out Cohen’s (2001) Student Stress and Coping Inventory for one example of a scale that you may be able to adapt.
Hope this helps!
– Nicole | Community Manager
Where can I get a copy of the Problem and Emotion-focused coping test?
I’m new to your blog and i really appreciate the nice posts and great layout.”*~;;
Hello Ms Chowdhury, your article is so simple and helpful for novice readers and practitioners. Down to earth initiative. Keep it up.
Hope to read or share more on academics and in helping profession.
Article is very good.i liked most the grounding exercises for children most.
Thanks Laxmi!
Can you provide the reference material for Macro-analytical trait oriented coping theory which you have mentioned in this article ?
please please provide reference for Macro-analytic, State-oriented coping theories
Hi Evvie,
Here is the referenced source for Lazarus and Folkman’s Stress and Coping model that we discussed on macro-analytic, state-oriented coping theories.
I hope this helps!
Kind regards,
Julia | Community Manager